Lonely vs. Alone

It used to be that I would feel lonely around the Hallmark days, but never alone. Lately, however, it has been just the opposite. You see, I have a back-up. The problem, though, is that I keep him at the top of my list, whereas he is saving me for the final cut. And so, here I am, moping on the most carded holiday of the year. But let's leave his story for another rainy day.

Back to the query: What's worse.........feeling lonely or alone?

Previously, loneliness seeped in and out of my life, but I knew I had someone on reserve, so I tried to not let it get to me. Plus, I had plenty of more or less single friends. We were a tight knit bunch, united in our affinity for the uncommitted life. We still are, though a few recent developments have threatened to rip open our circle. Which brings me to........

Why Blog: Reason #3 (Friendsunk)

Like I said, my gals and I are very close. We all met as Freshmen while living in the same dorm complex and our bonds flourished with each periodic gathering in the later terms. Boyfriends came and went but no trouble was felt because none of them stuck around long enough to be welcomed or accepted. Now, though, one of our friends has nabbed a welcomed, potential suitor. Don't get me wrong. We're happy for her. This is what we've wanted for each other. I just didn't think C would leave me so quickly.

At first, I thought it was envy I felt, since said suitor was a potential for most of us and plus I assumed C's time was still distant. However, I eventually came to realize that it was actually sadness that was gnawing at me (quite literally). I play the supportive friend, but each time she relays her new stories, I feel an invisible pair of forceps pinching me. [On a side note: This must be how R feels whenever he sees his newly engaged ex.] Thus, I turn to blogger-space to mark this end of an era and leap forth onto a new ship to sail beyong C & E.

Oops, I just noticed the question went un-answered. But it's late and all of the lovebirds have flown, so I'll leave the answer up to you readers.